The Bird in the Back

A crow
hidden, buried
in lifeless, naked trees
cackles at the threat of snowfall
’til noon.

A. M. Yeager


The Trees Dance

My toddler is quite amazing.

She tells me in that squeak of a voice,
a quiet, excited sort of voice,
that the trees dance to the beat of the wind

and she’ll dance with them with her fingers
above her head to catch nature’s song,
singing her own soft tune.

A. M. Yeager

What Not to Say to a Pregnant Woman (Again)

Don’t tell me what I can’t do!

I’m in my third trimester with my second baby and I’m at a different location I was than when I was pregnant with my first, so new people. I got a lot of comments and advice and what not the first time around, and as luck would have it, I’m getting it again. 

I would like to think of myself as being a patient person, a person who isn’t very snippy on a normal day, a sweet person, but boy, oh boy do I get pretty sassy while pregnant.

Seriously, I don’t know where my sass comes from. Is it the lack of sleep? The back ache? The pelvis ache? The constant hunger? The feeling of not being able to breathe? The hormones? The feeling that I’m looking more like a blimp than an actual human being? Whatever it is, here are the top pregnancy/parenting comments that get me eye rolling. And no, I don’t reply with this much sass! (Usually). 😉

1.) “Are you having twins? You look like you are!”

I get that twins are pretty interesting, but no, I’m not. I just look like I am because I JUST had a baby before my body had time to go back to normal. My abs didn’t go back together. Like I said-blimp!

2.) “You’re having another one? Was this one planned?”

Not that it’s your business, but we like children. Bunny will be a great sister. God has His own plans. We’re Lutheran. What can I say?

3.) “You found out the gender and already have a name picked out? That’s a little weird.”

Yeah, people thought it was weird when we didn’t find out what Bunny was too. We can’t win!

4.) “I thought you had a rough pregnancy the first time. Should you really be having another one?” 

My first pregnancy went really well until I had Cholestasis, but there are no guarantees that I’ll have it again with this baby. It’s not really our choice (it is and isn’t) but it’s ultimately God’s choice. Children are a gift from Him and we love this baby!

5.) “You’re eating another piece of chocolate?”

I eat really healthy for the most part. Sometimes I just need two pieces of chocolate…especially if I’m going to put up with constant judging. 😉 

6.) “You guys should have waited. Having kids close together like that is really hard.”

You know what? It’s pretty awesome to think that these children will be 18 months apart especially since my sibling and I are 15 months apart and are best friends. Bunny and Bear will be close and be playmates, and have a lot of fun together. 

7.) “You do know that the newborn will hog all the attention and your toddler will be jealous and hate the baby, right?”

Ummm, maybe in some cases that happens, but this piece of chocolate is really delicious, and I don’t care. Bunny loves babies. I’m sure she’ll get along well.

8.) “You better not breastfeed the new baby. You’ll have to start breastfeeding your toddler again!”

Ooookaaayyyy…? That’s none of your business either, but you know what? I’m just going to say that if that happens then you and I will just have to deal with it. And as John Locke said, “don’t tell me what I can’t do!” 

9.) “You might as well get use to being a single mom, because that’s what it’s going to feel like. That’s what happens when you have more than one. Husbands just don’t give as much help the second time!”

I’m not quite sure what you mean, but my husband is amazing and completely loving and supportive. He is all for having a second baby! He’s a wonderful dad to Bunny and he’s going to be a wonderful dad to Bear as well.

10.) “You’re having a natural birth, right?”

I wanted one with Bunny, but because I got one hour of sleep in three days, and because I had to be induced for medical reasons, it just didn’t happen. I’d like to do it this time, but you know those epidurals really are pretty nice if you are in labor for three days….

11.) “How did you get pregnant?”

You look old enough to know how that works. I got this question when I was pregnant with Bunny too.